Return Home

Mistress Abigaille?

Dear Mistress Abigaille

Advice from a real Peer -
so it must be good!

Dear Mistress Abigaille,

Sometimes at SCA events, I notice the strangest smell. It's like a combination of sweat, poop, and vinegar. What is the cause of this? It's really gross.

— Lady Goldfish

Dear Lady,

Yes, it is really gross. No one wants to do a lot of research on the subject, but I think you realize that it's caused by poor hygiene, possibly brought on by laziness or a misguided effort at periodicity. Since Febreze doesn't work on humans, I suggest you research pomanders — and stand upwind of the offending party.

Dear Mistress Abigaille,

About 15 years ago, I wrote several articles that have been printed in various publications throughout the Known World. Are there any copyright limitations I should be concerned about? And does this fulfill the Laurels' requirement that I have my work published?

— Anxious in Ansteorra

Dear Anxious,

You'll probably want to write some new articles soon. Only Laurels can rest on their laurels, so to speak.

Dear Mistress Abigaille,

I can't stand the sound of screaming children, yet they seem to be everywhere at SCA events. I hope that writing to you will call attention to this problem.

— Deaf in Darkwater

Dear Deaf,

That trick never works! Deal with it - kids scream all the time.

Got a perplexing SCA-related dilemma? E-mail Mistress Abigaille

The Quarter - Entertaining Bored SCAdians since AS xxxiii