Dear Mistress Abigaille

Advice from a real Peer -
so it must be good!

Dear Mistress Abigaille:

My friends say I have a problem, but I don't think it's a big deal. They say I have too much fabric, just because my spare bedroom, and my 20' x 20' storage unit, are filled with rubbermaid storage boxes full of fabrics I've picked up here and there. I skip work to go fabric shopping from time to time, to keep current with any new materials out there. One time at Pennsic, I snatched a piece of fabric right out of the hands of a Laurel! You have to be quick to get the good stuff! With all the shopping I have to do, I don't have enough time to sew many new things. Do you think my friends are jealous of my stash?

— Material Girl in Mathom Trove

Dear Material Girl,

First of all, let give you this bit of advice — never cross a Peer when it comes to shopping, take it from me. We have memories like elephants, sister! Second of all, your hoarding of fabric indicates a larger problem. You feel unloved, and the only way you can think to fill the aching void in your life is to buy up all the fabric you can get your grubby mitts on. This causes a vicious cycle, as you begin to feel self-hatred when you realize if you had five lifetimes you could never sew up all that stuff into new garb.

Here's what to do: Sell all your fabric as a Kingdom fund raiser for the Trimaris Land Fund. You'll get the admiration of the people, who will finally gain a campground to call their own, and you'll get the warm feeling from helping others at last get the perfect fabric to make their long-dreamed-of Italian/Elizabethan/Tudor/Carolingian. Yes, your fabric will now sit waiting on the shelves of others.

CONFIDENTIAL TO "WHAT ABOUT ME?" — Oscar Wilde said it best: "There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about."