Top Ten Gulf Wars Givens

10. It's all fun and games until somebody from Wyndryder gets hurt

9. No matter how hard you resist the urge, you still look when you lift the port-a-let seat

8. Regardless of how you pack, you won't have the right clothes

7. Countess Honoree still doesn't like being teased

6. Sir Elizabeth will go crazy in the marketplace

5. Sir Cadwyd will run out of cash

4. Crickets 'R' us

3. Monkey hate dirt

2. Better health through trench digging and filling

1. You will awaken to the sounds of doumbeks at least once