The SCA, Inc. would like to apologize to everyone in the Known World for this publication. It is disgusting and bad and thoroughly disobedient, and please don't bother to call the BoD because we know it's very tasteless, but the writers don't really mean it and they do all come from broken homes and have very unhappy personal lives, especially Drusilla. Anyway, they're really very nice people underneath and try to forgive them because The Quarter is going through an unhappy phase at the moment, what with SCA-TV being declared legally dead and nobody ever sending them email.
The information in this publication is from sources believed reliable, but no guaranty or warrant is made as to its accuracy or safety. The Editor, The Quarter, and the Society for Creative Anachronism, Inc. assume no liability for the reader's use or misuse of the information contained herein, nor for any resultant property damage, other economic loss or bodily injury arising out of the reader's reliance on any claim, product or procedure contained herein. The information in this issue may prove hazardous, and the reader should take great care when undertaking the activities or handling the products discussed in this publication. The information and procedures discussed in this publication are not intended to be utilized by children. This issue may contain satire, humor and possibly even actual legitimate information. No animals were harmed in the making of this product. The Quarter is (not) cruelty-free. Any resemblance to actual persons, places, things or events is either purely coincidental or intended as a parody. Not responsible for typographical errors. Peers! Please feel free to read this publication while stuck in boring peerage meetings. Everyone is more than welcome to read this during court when you can't understand a word that's being said. Do not operate heavy equipment while reading this publication. Kids! Get your parents' permission before reading this. Operators are standing by. Warning! Cheap ink used in the production of this genuine faux newsletter may cause a burning rash. Consult a doctor before reading this if you are on antidepressants.